Beyond Courtesy–The Call to Radicality

It is interesting that since I’ve started this blog I have become increasingly aware of my actions, words and even attitudes towards others. Every time I get impatient in traffic and want to honk or want to be rude to the airport security officer, I think about this blog and how I’m always writing about this “civilization of love” that I believe in so much. But how hard it is to truly live it out!

I often think how we can be radical witnesses like the martyrs were during the Great Persecution but without having to suffer martyrdom, because the circumstances have changed for us now. Freedom has been granted to us from this kind of persecution by the State (in most countries), so it is almost as if God seats back and tells us: “Ok, now what are you going to do with that freedom?” It can be scary and overwhelming. In the midst of this freedom we can take for granted our every day lives and the repercussions of our actions on the greater harmony of the universe. Going to the store, cleaning the house, driving to Mass just seem too mundane of tasks, because we are free to perform them without worries. This is why I believe that it is through the “Little Way” that we can be true and radical witnesses. The secret lies in performing our duties just as everybody else does whether they are believers or non-believers, but to go beyond the simple duties. This is how we stay permanently accountable for our actions and their repercussions, but also we keep ourselves aware and thankful for our true freedom–that given by God when He died for us.

What do I mean by “going beyond” our ordinary duties? We all know we are supposed to say “thank you” after somebody opens the door for us, give our seat to a woman or an elderly person on the bus who is standing, or pick up the pen dropped by the person standing in front of us. But we need to go beyond simple courtesy, because what makes us Christians and, thus, inherently different from this world is that we are a people of love–all our actions are based on love and guided by love. The simple tasks in our lives regardless of whether they are done for ourselves or for others are done for the sake of love: not for the mere sake of being “nice” or because we have a sense of duty.

To put this principle into action can prove itself rather difficult, but I can give you a few examples of what I do and hopefully you have more ideas than me. For me, it is a matter of being considerate towards those who already have difficult jobs: such as picking up the trash or cleaning restrooms and lessen their burden in any way we can. For instance, there is a huge dumpster on my apartment complex and many times people just put their trash bags on the side, instead of inside the dumpster because it smells, so they are picked through by cats during the night and they make a mess. What I do is to put my trash bag in the dumpster rather than throwing them on the side and if I see other people’s trash bags on the side and it is manageable for me just to pick them up and throwing them in the dumpster, then I do so. Same thing with public restrooms, for instance. If I dried my hands with a paper towel and I miss the trash can when throwing it away, then I pick it up instead of leaving it there on the floor. Another example is for instance not only opening the door for an elderly person, but to go further depending on the person and the situation, obviously; for instance, to help them sit down or to help them grab a book or a can from the shelf. Same with homeless people, for example. It is not enough to give them a couple of bucks you have in your pocket, but rather to go and talk to them and ask them what they need and buy them food if you’re able to. We all spend a lot of time at work and there are plenty of opportunities there to go beyond courtesy. If you see your coworker stressed out because he has something to finish up before he can go to his son’s soccer game, then if it is feasible, you could perhaps offer to finish it up for him and tell him not to worry about it. Those are just some ideas. Any more?

There are many situations in which we can go beyond courtesy that are impossible to enumerate here.  Perhaps a mental check can make it easier.  We can ask ourselves constantly: “How can I perform this task or series of tasks and show this person or these people that I’m not doing it only because I have to our I should, but because I am absolutely in love with them, because I see God in them?”